Scary

Saw the ugliest baby ever on Saturday. Swear to god. It was either a baby or a horribly disfigured midget. I cannot accurately describe it, which is wholly to your benefit. From the quick, painful glance I got, I imagine that the wretched little thing could never, ever hope to close it's mouth. Not even Mick Jagger's lips could cover those craggy, creepy bicuspids. Her insane eyes also seemed incapable of ever shutting. Those two features kind of made any other visual information gathering nigh-impossible, but I got the impression that the skin was blotchy, pallid and not at all comfortable at ease on the bones underneath it.

This is what I said to Carla: "I just saw the ugliest baby ever. I just about yelped." Carla had to have a look for herself. I watched her approach, saw her try to steal a glance and winced as she nearly gave herself whiplash.

She says I didn't adequately prepare her. That may well be true. In my defense, I was rendered nearly mute. My brain was in a state of shock, my powers of description were even more retarded than is the norm. It was a bad scene.

*shudder*

Abstemious

"I look back over what I've written and I know it's wrong, not because of what I've set down, but because of what I've omitted. What isn't there has a presence, like the absence of light.

You want the truth, of course. You want me to put two and two together. But two and two doesn't necessarily get you the truth. Two and two equals a voice outside the window. Two and two equals the wind. The living bird is not its labeled bones."

I finished The Blind Assassin. I never remember if I'm supposed to bold or italicize book titles. If only there was some way to check such a thing. But I have no time for that. I'm blogging. I quite enjoyed the book. There were a lot of good words in it, put together flawlessly. Not that it is my favourite book, but easily the best book I've read in this country. I've read a fair bit. Still can't read non-fiction without falling asleep.

She compared a dude's face to a testicle. I wish I would have dog-eared that page so I could quote it.

Motherfuckers Gettin' HURT!!

I trust we've all seen Ong Bak. I know there weren't no story, but it looked pretty good and God Damn in Tony Jaa ain't amazin'!! Well, it looks like that flick was just a warm up. Tom-Yum Goong is his latest film and I think he won't be making another one for quite some time because he appears to cripple every stunt man he gets close to. I mean: JEEZUSS!! This shit looks painful! I warn you now, the site is beyond slow, so start downloading the trailer, go out and rent Ong Bak, watch it, return it and then watch the trailer. Unless you try for the large size trailer, I doubt you''ll get the whole thing before the actual movie comes out.

God damn, he kicks a dude right in the fucking head! I know, you've seen it a thousand times before. I know. But you've never seen it like this.

Holy fuck.

Grr

It annoys me how much I don't get done in a day. I haven't sat down and studied any Japanese in forever. I haven't written anything of any import in about as long. What did I spend my night on tonight? Reading forums. That is not a good use of time. Man, I suck.

FHjo

Yeah, not really so much to say. Work is still work, and there ain't much else going on right now. But, I really don't want to not write just because I have nothing to say. I must write damnit. Yep. I must write, but you are by no means required to read all this scribbled drivel.

I have at least three gray hairs on my head. I don't like that. Back in Australia, I had a white hair in my goatee. Now that was cool. These grey fuckers, not so much. I totally meant to use two different spellings of grey. I'll leave it up to you to figure out why.

Curses

So I said that I would both blog and study more. The studying part hasn't so much happened yet. Dang. But I do feel compelled to post at least something every day to this world wide web of nets. Even if I have nothing to say. I guess I could just make shit up. Like this:

If you are passing by some bushes and the bushes say "Oi!", do not stop and talk to whomever is in the bushes. Bad things will happen.

I Just Totally Blogged

Sure, I surfed the internet a little bit, but I didn't do it for as long as I could have (and usually do). I haven't even played with Kimber yet, and it's best to try to train her while Carla ain't around. She doesn't like listening to me repeat the same commands over and over and over again. Dude, I totally picked blogging over the internet and videogames.

Yay me!

Munificence

munificence

n : liberality in bestowing gifts; extremely liberal and generous of spirit [syn: largess, largesse, magnanimity, openhandedness]

I just now learned this word. I'm quite busy not learning Japanese words, but I looked up this here 'munificence' on dictionary.com. Why? Because of Margaret Atwood. I likes me my Margaret Atwood. This is a new discovery for me. I mean, I'm sure I've liked her for years now, it's just that I haven't picked up any of her books until about a month ago. That book was Wilderness Tips, a collection of short stories. Short stories about women mainly. Depressing mainly. The happiest story ended with a slightly older than middle age woman crying in her bathroom during the Christmas holidays. Yet I loved every sentence of it. Maybe not every sentence. But there were perfect sentences in there. Sentences that made me stop reading, just so I could grin and drink them in again. Sentences that a trillion monkeys on a whole lot of really nice typewriters would have a hard time topping.

I don't own Wilderness Tips, so I can't quote any of those sentences, but I am right now reading 'The Blind Assassin' and loving it even more. I''m less than 50 pages in, but man am I digging it. Somehow has made put me right inside the head of an elderly woman. Which is not somewhere I ever thought I would be.

(on the subject of her thinning hair)
"Beneath it there are glimpses of scalp, the greyish pink of mice feet.
If I ever get caught in a high wind my hair will blow off like dandelion
fluff, leaving only a tiny pockmarked nubbin of bald head."

That's just good stuff.

Makes me feel even more crap about my own writing, but whatever. I am so disenchanted with my own abilities at the moment, that I couldn't even muster any energy to even attempt to imply that Atwood is, like, totally munificent for sharing her words with the world.

Even More Boobs

Damn!! Forgot another great thing about Japan and boobs. In any large store of any kind you will find the massage chair section. This section will always be full. More often than not, a few of the occupants will be comely lasses. Which is great. Let me tell you why. The massage chairs here are fairly forceful. They push the recipient around a bit. So when a cute girl's back is being kneaded, it affects her front as well. God, I am such a perv. Plus, the girls have such blissful on their cute faces. Which, if all Japanese pornography is to be believed, is not something that happens in close proximity to bouncing breasts all that often. It is really hard not to stare.

Also, my spell checker just won't listen when I tell it to learn 'boobs'.

More Boobs

Back when I waxed slightly waxxy about bosoms, I totally forgot to mention how totally awesome girls on bikes are. Bikes are like perpetual motion machines. That is all.

Plans That Will Not Be Fruity

Seeing as I now commute about an hour and a half less every day than I used to, I figured I should try to spend this new surplus of time in a productive manner. The plan, as it now stands is to spend about 45 minutes a day writing and the other 45 studying the Nihongo. I always make plans like this and rarely do I ever see them through to fruition. Even if I do write more, it will probably just be about boobs.