I think I finally figured out why I've been so moody lately. It's not because I've been sick for months. And it's not that this constant sickness is a constant source of anxiety for me at my job, cuz why would they want to keep a sicky like me around when there are other, more healthy Caucasians to be found. And it's not cuz Carla and I didn't get the apartment we wanted. Fuck, was that a nice apartment. TV in the bathroom.
It's none of these things. I've been moody because I've been derelict. Derelict in my duties as a browncoat. The trailer for Serenity is up. Has been up for near a week now. I meant to throw up a link here as soon as it went live. I didn't. I aim to rectify that.
Serenity is, of course, the Firefly movie. Firefly was, of course, one of the reasons why television was invented. Joss Whedon's ability to weave action, humour, plot, characters, suspense, cheese, Chinese swearing, philosophy, and everything else together has always awed and humbled me. His film track record ain't so sterling but Serenity looks to change all that.
If I could, I would stand in line for tickets to this move. Hell, I'm giving thought to flying somewhere so I can see it early. Early for me, I mean. No idea when it's coming out here.
I threw in the Firefly DVD so I could accurately quote some of the dialogue, and I ended up watching much more than I needed to. Objects in Space is one of my favourite hours of anything ever. But it's just barely my favourite episode.
Saturday, April 30, 2005
Friday, April 22, 2005
Sorry
<a hreh="http://www.4q.cc/vin/index.php">Link</a> that's what I typed in my post last night. As we all know, it should be <a href=... Sorry about that. And in the short time it took for someone to notice my error, write in a snarky comment (thank you Anonymous) and for me to fix the problem, the site seems to have broken. Damn. The link in the previous post works now. You can check if you want. I hope it gets unbroke soon. But, for now, I will just post some of my favourite random facts about Vin Diesel.
Vin Diesel once used Gary Coleman as a hand puppet. Coleman said the experience changed his life and led him to give up smoking.
Vin Diesel once had cancer, but he coughed out the tumor and then used it to butter his bread.
Vin Diesel is a strict vegan vegetarian in all respects except that he will eat shrimp. When challenged on this, he insists the shrimp are "the lettuce of the sea".
Vin Diesel can read braille with his scrotum.
Vin Diesel once circumnavigated the globe in the hulled carcass of George Burns.
Vin Diesel once got so angry at a man that he punched him hard enough to cause his ancestors to feel it. This is how Napoleon lost the Battle of Waterloo.
Only about a thousandth of Vin Diesel's mass is expressed in the three dimensions we can perceive.
His intestines can hold 13% more bacon than mere mortals.
Vin Diesel once used a 3 year old child as a baseball bat during softball practice. That child was Bjork.
Vin Diesel was once asked if he believed in the idea of reincarnation. His response was simply "I used to be a plate of pancakes."
Not only can Vin Diesel comprehend infinity, he can express it in terms of pi.
He starts his day by arguing with a bowl of green apples.
Vin once went sledding in New Hampshire and broke the sound barrier by turning his head around and blowing forcefully. As a result of the shock waves, several children died. Vin ascended to heaven and repeatedly punched God in the eye until he brought them all back to life. Every single one of those children are now scientists.
Vin Diesel can cut 2" thick steel piping using only his rectum and Beatrice Arthur.
Vin Diesel is the only man to run around the Earth at the equator and kill a wolverine in the same day.
If you whisper Vin Diesel's name to a newborn penguin, he will attempt to suckle your teat.
matt damon
If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around...Vin still hears it.
Vin Diesel wrote the book of Mormon because he wanted to beat up the people who thought it was real.
Vin Diesel once sneezed so hard a nearby building exploded. Upon seeing the explosion, Vin Diesel flew around the world counterclockwise fast enough to reverse time. After he had reversed time for 10 minutes, He went back to the building and went inside. He then punched Stalin in the face. Thus, Communism fell.
Bruce Campbell is the only being in our dimension capable of killing Vin Diesel, but the vacuum left by his absence would collapse the universe. To this day, the actors refuse to be wthin a thousand miles of eachother's presence.
Vin Diesel sometimes accuses acorns of being lazy.
Vin Diesel once faked his own death after a sheperd boy hit him in the head with a rock from a sling.
Vin Diesel has a black belt in pudding, which is not a martial art. He's just that good at it.
Vin Diesel can drink a packet of Swiss Miss chocolate mix and urinate a steaming cup of hot cocoa. Interestingly enough, this only works with the Swiss Miss brand, and is now one of their main selling points.
Vin Diesel is the only person to ever beat Battletoads without dying.
Every time Vin Diesel kills god, a kitten masturbates.
When Vin Diesel is sad, magical puppies appear to cheer him up.
Vin Diesel enjoys clapping babies together like erasers. He calls it blapping. *I think this one is my favourite*
Vin Diesel defied MC Hammer and touched it.
Vin Diesel doesn't actually have bones or internal organs. Underneath his skin is another slightly smaller Vin Diesel and underneath that is yet another even smaller Vin Diesel. After the third layer his body is filled with rich, creamy nougat.
Vin created belt buckles to prevent his waist from shooting lasers.
For Halloween, Vin Diesel cuts down a tree, scoops out the inside, fills it with candy, and then stabs anyone who rings his doorbell. He then eats the candy-filled tree.
"Vin Diesel" can be rearranged into "I Send Evil." And he does so, in the form of flying monkeys.
Vin Diesel once killed a man in Reno just to watch him die. He then
summoned Jesus to bring the man back to life, at which point Vin killed
them both.
Well, this is one of my longer posts. I went on a bit longer than I meant to. Sorry about that.
Vin Diesel once used Gary Coleman as a hand puppet. Coleman said the experience changed his life and led him to give up smoking.
Vin Diesel once had cancer, but he coughed out the tumor and then used it to butter his bread.
Vin Diesel is a strict vegan vegetarian in all respects except that he will eat shrimp. When challenged on this, he insists the shrimp are "the lettuce of the sea".
Vin Diesel can read braille with his scrotum.
Vin Diesel once circumnavigated the globe in the hulled carcass of George Burns.
Vin Diesel once got so angry at a man that he punched him hard enough to cause his ancestors to feel it. This is how Napoleon lost the Battle of Waterloo.
Only about a thousandth of Vin Diesel's mass is expressed in the three dimensions we can perceive.
His intestines can hold 13% more bacon than mere mortals.
Vin Diesel once used a 3 year old child as a baseball bat during softball practice. That child was Bjork.
Vin Diesel was once asked if he believed in the idea of reincarnation. His response was simply "I used to be a plate of pancakes."
Not only can Vin Diesel comprehend infinity, he can express it in terms of pi.
He starts his day by arguing with a bowl of green apples.
Vin once went sledding in New Hampshire and broke the sound barrier by turning his head around and blowing forcefully. As a result of the shock waves, several children died. Vin ascended to heaven and repeatedly punched God in the eye until he brought them all back to life. Every single one of those children are now scientists.
Vin Diesel can cut 2" thick steel piping using only his rectum and Beatrice Arthur.
Vin Diesel is the only man to run around the Earth at the equator and kill a wolverine in the same day.
If you whisper Vin Diesel's name to a newborn penguin, he will attempt to suckle your teat.
matt damon
If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around...Vin still hears it.
Vin Diesel wrote the book of Mormon because he wanted to beat up the people who thought it was real.
Vin Diesel once sneezed so hard a nearby building exploded. Upon seeing the explosion, Vin Diesel flew around the world counterclockwise fast enough to reverse time. After he had reversed time for 10 minutes, He went back to the building and went inside. He then punched Stalin in the face. Thus, Communism fell.
Bruce Campbell is the only being in our dimension capable of killing Vin Diesel, but the vacuum left by his absence would collapse the universe. To this day, the actors refuse to be wthin a thousand miles of eachother's presence.
Vin Diesel sometimes accuses acorns of being lazy.
Vin Diesel once faked his own death after a sheperd boy hit him in the head with a rock from a sling.
Vin Diesel has a black belt in pudding, which is not a martial art. He's just that good at it.
Vin Diesel can drink a packet of Swiss Miss chocolate mix and urinate a steaming cup of hot cocoa. Interestingly enough, this only works with the Swiss Miss brand, and is now one of their main selling points.
Vin Diesel is the only person to ever beat Battletoads without dying.
Every time Vin Diesel kills god, a kitten masturbates.
When Vin Diesel is sad, magical puppies appear to cheer him up.
Vin Diesel enjoys clapping babies together like erasers. He calls it blapping. *I think this one is my favourite*
Vin Diesel defied MC Hammer and touched it.
Vin Diesel doesn't actually have bones or internal organs. Underneath his skin is another slightly smaller Vin Diesel and underneath that is yet another even smaller Vin Diesel. After the third layer his body is filled with rich, creamy nougat.
Vin created belt buckles to prevent his waist from shooting lasers.
For Halloween, Vin Diesel cuts down a tree, scoops out the inside, fills it with candy, and then stabs anyone who rings his doorbell. He then eats the candy-filled tree.
"Vin Diesel" can be rearranged into "I Send Evil." And he does so, in the form of flying monkeys.
Vin Diesel once killed a man in Reno just to watch him die. He then
summoned Jesus to bring the man back to life, at which point Vin killed
them both.
Well, this is one of my longer posts. I went on a bit longer than I meant to. Sorry about that.
Sunday, April 17, 2005
Old Timey Music
This is where I type some regular text to better differentiate between the title above and the link below. I should have done this for my House of Cosbys post. It's a House of Cosbys. But, no, it's not. Not this time. This time it is:
Kinda lamely cool
Kinda lamely cool
Thursday, April 14, 2005
Fucking Ducks
I like ducks. They are one of the few species of birds that don't have scary eyes. Have you seen the eyes of a chicken? Then you have seen the eyes of madness. But ducks are okay in my books. But I can't say the sight of them having intercourse is all that pleasant.
Well now, these are a couple of fine looking ducks.
This may look like a picture of just one duck, but I assure you it is not. The male, when he starts his 'bidness' (that's the scientifically correct term), forces the female to stay submerged.
Every once in a while, the female will poke her head above the water and the male pecks at it. That ain't cool.
Unless you're in to that kind of thing.
Well now, these are a couple of fine looking ducks.
This may look like a picture of just one duck, but I assure you it is not. The male, when he starts his 'bidness' (that's the scientifically correct term), forces the female to stay submerged.
Every once in a while, the female will poke her head above the water and the male pecks at it. That ain't cool.
Unless you're in to that kind of thing.
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