This is the week wherein I turn 35.
Crud.
So this is me writing. Because I really should do that more.
It is a sad sad thing that the highest grossing movie of the year was Alice in Wonderland. That was a horrendous movie, a misfire on every level. And I didn't even see it in 3D, which would have added an extra dimension of suck.
Whenever a word contains a doubled letter, I rarely double the right letter, I usually double the letters on one side or the other. I wonder if there is some sort of scientific name for that?
Back to what I was talking about before, I'm glad that Toy Story 3 is now the highest grossing movie of the year. I haven't seen it yet but there is no way it could be worse than Alice in Wonderland. Good year for Disney it would seem.
Whenever I go into an electronics store, I always point all the youtubes towards my Japan videos. That's just how I role.
The thing that I liked most about The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo was that it didn't over explain things. A lot of stuff happened and the film just assumed you could keep up. I liked that.
I liked that because I have seen a couple otherwise enjoyable flicks this summer that insulted me with their...
The A-Team could have been about 10 minutes shorter because it spends about that much of its running time repeating itself. It flashes back to stuff that was onscreen not 15 minutes ago. Just in case you weren't paying attention. Hey A Team: I wasn't paying all that much attention and I still found all that repetition pointless and stupid.
I never thought that my biggest beef with the A Team movie would be that it talked down to me.
Most laptop keyboards are not all that great for typing. That seems almost criminal, when you think about it.
Knight and Day was not as insulting as A Team, but I don't need the characters onscreen to read aloud and remark upon every bit of text that appears onscreen.
That Dragon Tattoo movie sure did have a lot of rape, boy howdy.
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
Kidz Flix
Bad kid's movies are bad. Maybe more than other movies because they are sullying new eyes. Just because the eyes are new does not mean they are stupid, don't make a lazy stupid movie because it seems like you can get away with it.
Not that I've seen a lot of bad children's (spellchecker does not like children's, but has no problem with children, I really don't understand how spellcheckers work sometimes) films of late.
I've seen two really good children's films. Cloudy With A Chance Of Meatballs was surprisingly good. Like, really good. Would have no problem watching it again good. Having my expectations lowered by all the Dreamworks and Sony "pop culture nut shot extravaganzas", I was not at all expecting Meatballs. I don't remember any nut nshots from the film. Or any pop culture appropriation/parody. Not to say that there weren't any knowing nods to other films, sly homages and such. There were, and they fit, they were appropriate. They were not Family Guy/ The Movie movies style "Look! We are referencing this thing! You know this thing! You like this thing! You like us!"
Sorry, got off on a bit of a rantgent there. It happens.
So no lazy humour. The humour arises from the story, from the situations, from the characters. And from the animation. This is a nice looking film. Very simple character designs, but very distinctive. I guess you could say that about the design of the whole movie. Simple, but distinctive.
Huh.
I guess I don't have to say any more than that.
But I will: more animated movies need Bruce Campbell and Neil Patrick Harris.
And I'm sure I will mention Meatballs more, just in comparison to Ponyo.
They are very different experiences. Cloudy With A Chance Of Meatballs is full of this manic energy and humour. Ponyo is reserved. Ghibli excels at the quiet wonder. But they also nail the big action beats when needed. Simply put, they make films like no other company out there.
The problem with that is that I don't have the vocabulary to discuss their films. Their films are good. Their films are very good. Their stories come from a very different culture, they seem alien yet inviting. They unfold at a different pace, a welcome change of pace.
Not that I've seen a lot of bad children's (spellchecker does not like children's, but has no problem with children, I really don't understand how spellcheckers work sometimes) films of late.
I've seen two really good children's films. Cloudy With A Chance Of Meatballs was surprisingly good. Like, really good. Would have no problem watching it again good. Having my expectations lowered by all the Dreamworks and Sony "pop culture nut shot extravaganzas", I was not at all expecting Meatballs. I don't remember any nut nshots from the film. Or any pop culture appropriation/parody. Not to say that there weren't any knowing nods to other films, sly homages and such. There were, and they fit, they were appropriate. They were not Family Guy/ The Movie movies style "Look! We are referencing this thing! You know this thing! You like this thing! You like us!"
Sorry, got off on a bit of a rantgent there. It happens.
So no lazy humour. The humour arises from the story, from the situations, from the characters. And from the animation. This is a nice looking film. Very simple character designs, but very distinctive. I guess you could say that about the design of the whole movie. Simple, but distinctive.
Huh.
I guess I don't have to say any more than that.
But I will: more animated movies need Bruce Campbell and Neil Patrick Harris.
And I'm sure I will mention Meatballs more, just in comparison to Ponyo.
They are very different experiences. Cloudy With A Chance Of Meatballs is full of this manic energy and humour. Ponyo is reserved. Ghibli excels at the quiet wonder. But they also nail the big action beats when needed. Simply put, they make films like no other company out there.
The problem with that is that I don't have the vocabulary to discuss their films. Their films are good. Their films are very good. Their stories come from a very different culture, they seem alien yet inviting. They unfold at a different pace, a welcome change of pace.
Sunday, February 28, 2010
MOVIES!!
Nothing but awesome movies this week.
Red Cliff is epic Woo. The drama is as over the top as the action. Which is as it should be. Lots of shots of dudes staring off into the distance. Lots of mulling, contemplating, introspection. But also lots of grand gestures. Lots of musical instrument playing. Lots of knowing smiles. Everything is so big. So big. Even the little moments.
But then there is even more goodness. The females in this movie are actually important. They contribute to the plot. They have character. They're not just pretty and helpless. And the planning! The counter planning! Epic battles as chess!
I loved this film. I had a smile on my face for basically the whole run time. Which wasn't as much of a problem as I had feared. I saw the American version, the two and a half hour version, not the four hour two part version. But the cuts weren't obvious, the film still flowed fine. It wasn't all just action chopped together willy nilly. But I look forward to watching the super long version just for more Woo-y goodness.
Woo!
Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans is insane. It starts out kinda kooky, then veers into its own special version of a typical police procedural, then it goes shitballs retarded. Just gloriously unhinged. Which is helped enormously by Nic Cage's performance. After this movie, you'll wonder if he was actually partaking of all the drugs he takes onscreen. Cuz I don't think Herzog would have a problem with that.
The day after we (friend and wife and me and wife) saw this film, my friend texted me "I think I love that film." I had to agree. We texted back and forth about all sorts of awesomeness. And we decided that Nic Cage is best when he is paired with a filmmaker as insane as he is. This film is a match made in heaven.
But it's not a film for everyone. My wife almost walked out of the film. Whereas as I was giddy by the end of the film. And man, that ending. Man!
The ending may well be the worst part of Black Dynamite, but it had built up such good will with me that I didn't really care. And it has an awesome beginning. I was ready for a sequel about 15 minutes in.
This film is, of course, a spoof of the blackspoitation films of the 70's. The main problem with this film is that it veers between the sublime spoof of Wright/Pegg (Hot Fuzz/Shaun of the Dead) and the dated parody of Zucker Abrams Zucker (Airplane et all). The film was awesome enough that it didn't need to have boom mics visible in shots.
Black Dynamite, the character is awesome and he is well supported by the rest of the cast. And the music is just perfect. I want the soundtrack. I wants it!
I highly recommend all three.
Red Cliff is epic Woo. The drama is as over the top as the action. Which is as it should be. Lots of shots of dudes staring off into the distance. Lots of mulling, contemplating, introspection. But also lots of grand gestures. Lots of musical instrument playing. Lots of knowing smiles. Everything is so big. So big. Even the little moments.
But then there is even more goodness. The females in this movie are actually important. They contribute to the plot. They have character. They're not just pretty and helpless. And the planning! The counter planning! Epic battles as chess!
I loved this film. I had a smile on my face for basically the whole run time. Which wasn't as much of a problem as I had feared. I saw the American version, the two and a half hour version, not the four hour two part version. But the cuts weren't obvious, the film still flowed fine. It wasn't all just action chopped together willy nilly. But I look forward to watching the super long version just for more Woo-y goodness.
Woo!
Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans is insane. It starts out kinda kooky, then veers into its own special version of a typical police procedural, then it goes shitballs retarded. Just gloriously unhinged. Which is helped enormously by Nic Cage's performance. After this movie, you'll wonder if he was actually partaking of all the drugs he takes onscreen. Cuz I don't think Herzog would have a problem with that.
The day after we (friend and wife and me and wife) saw this film, my friend texted me "I think I love that film." I had to agree. We texted back and forth about all sorts of awesomeness. And we decided that Nic Cage is best when he is paired with a filmmaker as insane as he is. This film is a match made in heaven.
But it's not a film for everyone. My wife almost walked out of the film. Whereas as I was giddy by the end of the film. And man, that ending. Man!
The ending may well be the worst part of Black Dynamite, but it had built up such good will with me that I didn't really care. And it has an awesome beginning. I was ready for a sequel about 15 minutes in.
This film is, of course, a spoof of the blackspoitation films of the 70's. The main problem with this film is that it veers between the sublime spoof of Wright/Pegg (Hot Fuzz/Shaun of the Dead) and the dated parody of Zucker Abrams Zucker (Airplane et all). The film was awesome enough that it didn't need to have boom mics visible in shots.
Black Dynamite, the character is awesome and he is well supported by the rest of the cast. And the music is just perfect. I want the soundtrack. I wants it!
I highly recommend all three.
Thursday, February 18, 2010
More Movies I Seen
Let's talk horror. I like horror. A lot. There is a lot of crazy stuff to be found. The lack of respect the genre receives frees the participants. Let's put the camera inside a torso and hack it open because fuck it, we ain't ever gettin no Oscar. Not that all films are so crazy inventive. Most aren't.
Within the last week I took in four films that can be viewed as horror films. They all have horrific elements at least.
The only one that I would out and out recommend is Black Sheep. Of all the different horror sub-genres, the horror comedy is my fave. Cuz bodily fluids are both humorous and horrific. Humourorific? I like the Kiwi accent, I love the New Zealand countryside, and I adore the creature effects by Weta. It's not all greatness. The leads are a bit bland, as is the villain. But people get gored by sheep. It's a simple joke, an obvious one. But I find that I like simple stuff that works.
Law Abiding Citizen doesn't work. Hardly at all. I mean it looks nice enough, the acting isn't laughable, this isn't amateur hour. Except it is. This story is laughable. But it isn't. Maybe you're sensing the problem here. Dude's family gets killed. Right in front of his face. That would suck. His lawyer goes for the easy conviction: one dude flips on his partner, he gets a couple years and his partner gets life. Why? Cuz the cops messed up the investigation? How? Fuck off, we've got people to kill.
The now non-husband/non-father goes crazy. A very deliberate kind of crazy. Which is helped by the fact that the non-husband used to figure out how to kill people for a living. He figures out how to kill everyone involved and then does. The end.
Yeah. There are all sorts of interesting ideas and arguments that could have been raised here, but aren't. Gerard Butler gets a rant or two about how he wants to bring the legal system down, but that's it. The film is not concerned with ideas, it's concerned with blowing things up. There is more though put into the Saw films. Which is basically what this film wants to be. But slightly more respectable. Notice I did not say better or any other qualitative word.
Daybreakers is somewhere between the above two. Some stuff works. But more doesn't. The Spierig brothers need better editors. The story idea is neat. Vampires have taken over the world. Humans are cattle basically. A cross between cattle and money. Blood banks takes on a very different meaning in this world. But the human population is dwindling. The blood supply is dwindling. And if vampires don't drink blood they go feral. So Ethan Hawke is trying to find a blood substitute.
He doesn't find a blood substitute. But thanks to Willem Dafoe and others in the human resistance, he discovers a cure. But does a world full of vampires want a cure?
Neat stuff in there. Mainly only given lip service, but it's not as damning in this film as Law Abiding Citizen because this one is about vampires and not the broken legal system. And there's some nice vampire-y stuff. The feral vamps are kinda scare-y. The blood bank boss is suitably slime-y. There's an daytime action/chase scene that makes good use of bullet holes and sunlight.
But then the Spierig brothers try adding in more stuff. Tensions between brothers, tension between fathers and daughters. Most of that stuff doesn't work. Nor does the music. It is way too over the top and loud. The jump scares are dumb. Basically screeching bats jump out from time to time. It's never scare-y, it's just always loud and annoying. The bat scares seem shoe horned in.
And the ending. Or endings. A bunch of stuff happens. In rapid, stupidly rapid succession. And then our leads drive off into the sunrise. For no reason other than the directors thought that it would look cool.
Which is the main problem of the flick. They did stuff because they thought it would be cool but it isn't always cool. A lot of it just ends up lame. But an enjoyable kind of lame.
Enjoyably lame is much preferable to just plain dull, which is what The Wolfman is. They were aiming for dread I suppose but they missed. It's just slow and boring. With lots of blood and dismemberment. It reminds me of reading American Psycho. The juxtaposition of banal detail and graphic violence was supposed to be shocking but it just made the violence as boring as the deadly dull in depth detail.
And the wolfman as a character, let's be honest, looks kind of stupid.
Within the last week I took in four films that can be viewed as horror films. They all have horrific elements at least.
The only one that I would out and out recommend is Black Sheep. Of all the different horror sub-genres, the horror comedy is my fave. Cuz bodily fluids are both humorous and horrific. Humourorific? I like the Kiwi accent, I love the New Zealand countryside, and I adore the creature effects by Weta. It's not all greatness. The leads are a bit bland, as is the villain. But people get gored by sheep. It's a simple joke, an obvious one. But I find that I like simple stuff that works.
Law Abiding Citizen doesn't work. Hardly at all. I mean it looks nice enough, the acting isn't laughable, this isn't amateur hour. Except it is. This story is laughable. But it isn't. Maybe you're sensing the problem here. Dude's family gets killed. Right in front of his face. That would suck. His lawyer goes for the easy conviction: one dude flips on his partner, he gets a couple years and his partner gets life. Why? Cuz the cops messed up the investigation? How? Fuck off, we've got people to kill.
The now non-husband/non-father goes crazy. A very deliberate kind of crazy. Which is helped by the fact that the non-husband used to figure out how to kill people for a living. He figures out how to kill everyone involved and then does. The end.
Yeah. There are all sorts of interesting ideas and arguments that could have been raised here, but aren't. Gerard Butler gets a rant or two about how he wants to bring the legal system down, but that's it. The film is not concerned with ideas, it's concerned with blowing things up. There is more though put into the Saw films. Which is basically what this film wants to be. But slightly more respectable. Notice I did not say better or any other qualitative word.
Daybreakers is somewhere between the above two. Some stuff works. But more doesn't. The Spierig brothers need better editors. The story idea is neat. Vampires have taken over the world. Humans are cattle basically. A cross between cattle and money. Blood banks takes on a very different meaning in this world. But the human population is dwindling. The blood supply is dwindling. And if vampires don't drink blood they go feral. So Ethan Hawke is trying to find a blood substitute.
He doesn't find a blood substitute. But thanks to Willem Dafoe and others in the human resistance, he discovers a cure. But does a world full of vampires want a cure?
Neat stuff in there. Mainly only given lip service, but it's not as damning in this film as Law Abiding Citizen because this one is about vampires and not the broken legal system. And there's some nice vampire-y stuff. The feral vamps are kinda scare-y. The blood bank boss is suitably slime-y. There's an daytime action/chase scene that makes good use of bullet holes and sunlight.
But then the Spierig brothers try adding in more stuff. Tensions between brothers, tension between fathers and daughters. Most of that stuff doesn't work. Nor does the music. It is way too over the top and loud. The jump scares are dumb. Basically screeching bats jump out from time to time. It's never scare-y, it's just always loud and annoying. The bat scares seem shoe horned in.
And the ending. Or endings. A bunch of stuff happens. In rapid, stupidly rapid succession. And then our leads drive off into the sunrise. For no reason other than the directors thought that it would look cool.
Which is the main problem of the flick. They did stuff because they thought it would be cool but it isn't always cool. A lot of it just ends up lame. But an enjoyable kind of lame.
Enjoyably lame is much preferable to just plain dull, which is what The Wolfman is. They were aiming for dread I suppose but they missed. It's just slow and boring. With lots of blood and dismemberment. It reminds me of reading American Psycho. The juxtaposition of banal detail and graphic violence was supposed to be shocking but it just made the violence as boring as the deadly dull in depth detail.
And the wolfman as a character, let's be honest, looks kind of stupid.
Friday, January 22, 2010
Three Movies I Saw
Man, I gots to get better at writing down my thoughts about films quicker. I saw Avatar on Monday and Synecdoche New York on... Saturday(?) and Ninja Assassin on Thursday.
Let's start with Ninja Assassin first. It is a very bloody movie. Which is kind of a good thing, I guess. But most of the gore looks super fake. It was all added in later by computers. That's like cheating or something. The story is not at all complex but is more complicated than it needed to be. The acting was. Yup.
Some of the shots were quite nice, there was some neat-o ninja action; ninjas emerging from shadows (overused in this movie but still cool), ninjas flitting in and out of view, a fuck tonne of throwing stars, a somewhat confusingly shot fight on a busy speedway. But there was also some blandly staged action.
It was a very hit or miss film. More misses than hits, but the hits were super bloody.
I have no idea what to say about Synecdoche New York. Mainly because I have no idea what it was about. No, that's not true, I just wanted to write it. The film is about a lot of things. A lot of important things.
All of Charlie Kaufman's films have been about important things. They have all been very interesting explorations of ideas. This film is as well, but disappears up its own ass. Which is kind of the point. It is about (but not just about) the importance and triviality of creative endeavors.
There are some great bits of dialogue, some cringe inducing exchanges, some wonderful bits of angst and anguish and despair and a few bits of hope sprinkled in as well. Just for flavour.
There was a lot going on.
There was also a lot going on in Avatar. Visually, of course. The story is simple and simply told. And some people are saying this is a bad thing. These people should watch the Star Wars prequels and the movies based on toys of the last few years. Simple stories simply told are so much better than needlessly complex stories poorly told or stupid stories incompetently told.
Cameron is what Lucas has been falsely accused of: a spinner of myths. There are heroes and there are villains. Daring deeds are done. It has worked as a story since words worked as words. Not everything need to be innovative, especially when the visuals are.
Cameron the writer knew what Cameron the director wanted to do and the story plays to that. The emphasis is less on the hero's journey than on where this journey takes place. This film is about Pandora. And good god is Pandora worth all the attention. There is a specificity here that is startling. The thought given to the world, its inhabitants and the interrelationship between the two boggles my mind.
And the Na'avi. Perfect. One day, maybe, we will get computer generated people that are indistinguishable from real ones (ignoring why we would ever want such a thing). But we ain't there yet. But humanoid blue cat alien thingees? The time is now. The elongated limbs, the over sized eyes, the expressiveness of the ears and tails, this all adds up to make the aliens seem real. Everything has to be slightly overdone to seem natural. You could take stills from just about any scene involving the Na'avi and they would all look ridiculous, but in motion they are pitch perfect.
I really liked this film. I liked it more than I thought I would, and I knew that I was going to like it. Cameron, for all of his technical prowess, has never forgotten how to structure a film. Something Lucas and Spielberg seem to have forgotten.
I could go on, but let's just bring it on home.
Ninja Assassin is as forgettable as it is bloody.
Synecdoche New York is a film to think on.
Avatar is a film to drink in.
Let's start with Ninja Assassin first. It is a very bloody movie. Which is kind of a good thing, I guess. But most of the gore looks super fake. It was all added in later by computers. That's like cheating or something. The story is not at all complex but is more complicated than it needed to be. The acting was. Yup.
Some of the shots were quite nice, there was some neat-o ninja action; ninjas emerging from shadows (overused in this movie but still cool), ninjas flitting in and out of view, a fuck tonne of throwing stars, a somewhat confusingly shot fight on a busy speedway. But there was also some blandly staged action.
It was a very hit or miss film. More misses than hits, but the hits were super bloody.
I have no idea what to say about Synecdoche New York. Mainly because I have no idea what it was about. No, that's not true, I just wanted to write it. The film is about a lot of things. A lot of important things.
All of Charlie Kaufman's films have been about important things. They have all been very interesting explorations of ideas. This film is as well, but disappears up its own ass. Which is kind of the point. It is about (but not just about) the importance and triviality of creative endeavors.
There are some great bits of dialogue, some cringe inducing exchanges, some wonderful bits of angst and anguish and despair and a few bits of hope sprinkled in as well. Just for flavour.
There was a lot going on.
There was also a lot going on in Avatar. Visually, of course. The story is simple and simply told. And some people are saying this is a bad thing. These people should watch the Star Wars prequels and the movies based on toys of the last few years. Simple stories simply told are so much better than needlessly complex stories poorly told or stupid stories incompetently told.
Cameron is what Lucas has been falsely accused of: a spinner of myths. There are heroes and there are villains. Daring deeds are done. It has worked as a story since words worked as words. Not everything need to be innovative, especially when the visuals are.
Cameron the writer knew what Cameron the director wanted to do and the story plays to that. The emphasis is less on the hero's journey than on where this journey takes place. This film is about Pandora. And good god is Pandora worth all the attention. There is a specificity here that is startling. The thought given to the world, its inhabitants and the interrelationship between the two boggles my mind.
And the Na'avi. Perfect. One day, maybe, we will get computer generated people that are indistinguishable from real ones (ignoring why we would ever want such a thing). But we ain't there yet. But humanoid blue cat alien thingees? The time is now. The elongated limbs, the over sized eyes, the expressiveness of the ears and tails, this all adds up to make the aliens seem real. Everything has to be slightly overdone to seem natural. You could take stills from just about any scene involving the Na'avi and they would all look ridiculous, but in motion they are pitch perfect.
I really liked this film. I liked it more than I thought I would, and I knew that I was going to like it. Cameron, for all of his technical prowess, has never forgotten how to structure a film. Something Lucas and Spielberg seem to have forgotten.
I could go on, but let's just bring it on home.
Ninja Assassin is as forgettable as it is bloody.
Synecdoche New York is a film to think on.
Avatar is a film to drink in.
Thursday, January 21, 2010
More Bleeps and Bloops
God damnit, I truncated my last post fairly severely. I didn't mention any of the music introduced to me via Rock Band.
Which is pretty impressive when you stop to think about it. Rock Band is a game where you play along with music you know and love. New stuff? You're too busy worrying about hitting all the notes to notice the song that the notes make. Maybe it's just me. But there are definitely songs that stood out even during the first play through.
Hell, let's go back to Guitar Hero 2.
It's weird seeing it in a different video game context.
Even Rats is the song that made me a Rock Band fan. Harmonix just threw in music they liked. As a bonus. To share with their fans music that they themselves were fans of. They seem to be music fans first video game developers a close second. Which is why Rock Band, in my humble opinion is the better band rhythm game.
And Rock Band is how I found out about
That was the only song I loved off of that album, unfortunately.
And Rock Band 2 introduced me to a bunch of songs I had never heard before but now love but if I had to pick only one (and according to the rules in my head that I just made up, I do) it would have to be
Still weirds me out that it's a dude singing that song. But these songs are why I am really hoping Harmonix puts out a new game. They've been great with releasing downloadable songs every damn week, but who is gonna take a chance on something they've never heard of? It needs to be Trojan horsed in with all sorts of other music people know and love. And that can only be done on a disc.
I just love that unfaithful line.
And I love CBC radio 3. It has introduced me to so many amazing songs and artists (I still haven't found a good non-Canada centric indie podcast though). But the artist that I can't get enough of at the moment is
I love that whole album (and I like that youtube video, those look exactly like pictures I would take). So, so much. And that came out in 2007. I'm two years out of hip. But I don't think I'll think of Welcome to the Night Sky as unhip. Lovely voices, lyrics that feel good in the mouth, that whole quiet loud quiet thing. This album was made for me to love it. And I do.
Which is pretty impressive when you stop to think about it. Rock Band is a game where you play along with music you know and love. New stuff? You're too busy worrying about hitting all the notes to notice the song that the notes make. Maybe it's just me. But there are definitely songs that stood out even during the first play through.
Hell, let's go back to Guitar Hero 2.
It's weird seeing it in a different video game context.
Even Rats is the song that made me a Rock Band fan. Harmonix just threw in music they liked. As a bonus. To share with their fans music that they themselves were fans of. They seem to be music fans first video game developers a close second. Which is why Rock Band, in my humble opinion is the better band rhythm game.
And Rock Band is how I found out about
That was the only song I loved off of that album, unfortunately.
And Rock Band 2 introduced me to a bunch of songs I had never heard before but now love but if I had to pick only one (and according to the rules in my head that I just made up, I do) it would have to be
Still weirds me out that it's a dude singing that song. But these songs are why I am really hoping Harmonix puts out a new game. They've been great with releasing downloadable songs every damn week, but who is gonna take a chance on something they've never heard of? It needs to be Trojan horsed in with all sorts of other music people know and love. And that can only be done on a disc.
I just love that unfaithful line.
And I love CBC radio 3. It has introduced me to so many amazing songs and artists (I still haven't found a good non-Canada centric indie podcast though). But the artist that I can't get enough of at the moment is
I love that whole album (and I like that youtube video, those look exactly like pictures I would take). So, so much. And that came out in 2007. I'm two years out of hip. But I don't think I'll think of Welcome to the Night Sky as unhip. Lovely voices, lyrics that feel good in the mouth, that whole quiet loud quiet thing. This album was made for me to love it. And I do.
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Beeps and Boops
What is it about music? Why do we like it, man? Why does it compel us? How can some person singing about something that has nothing to do with the listener affect the mood of the listener? It is crazy magic. It is emotional alchemy.
And I am a soft touch. So, so soft. My heart is on my sleeve. Plus it is oversized. I've got a lot of heart, is what I'm saying, and it is a very sensitive heart. Music, the right music, punches me right in my big soft heart.
Everything and everyone is putting of best of the year and best of the decade lists. I have not listened to enough music to make such a list, but there is a list I can make. Music of the last decade that punches my heart and. In a good way.
I don't mean that they make me sob. That they make me sad. That they make me feel bad. No. But they make me feel. My brain becomes aware of my eyes and my breathing and my heart rate, because they've all been affected by this music I'm listening to. Music, man, crazy.
Right. The List.
My Emotional Hits of the Naughts:
I'm going to start with the song that inspired this whole thing. I heard this on the R3-30, and then re-listened to it a good half dozen time before I could continue the countdown And this is from an album from 2008, how the hell did I miss this.?
It's a lovely little song, but the part where it's just the dude and his guitar that really gets me. That's the part that made me notice the song and then listen to it a zilion times. And the zillion times made me notice all the other bits of loveliness in there. Lots going on in that song. I want to go into detail, but I don't want to sound like a wanker.
And I could wank all over any of theses songs.
But taking inspiration from the dude and a guitar let us listen to...
How does that work? Just a dude and some kinda noise maker singing gibberish (she brings me seeds from olive trees?) and it dampens my eyes. The crowd singing along really helps, I reckon.
Speaking of singing along: one of, if not my favourite concert going experiences was seeing Arcade Fire (this was pre Neon Bible, just to give a time frame). And screaming along with the rest of the crowd to all the songs. So primal. A lot of their music gets me, but the one that works the best on me is
Just imagine yelling along with that. Good for the soul. Maybe I should have used Wake Up instead. The acoustic version, the one from the Where the Wild Things Are trailer? Hell, that trailer makes my vision blur every damn time.
But back to just a dude and a guitar.
I looked and I looked but I could not find a linkable version of Greg Macpherson's The Company Store. But I highly recommend you listen to it. It's about something that happened a long time ago to people you don't know, but it is such an angry song you just want to punch someone by the end of it. Again, anger at something long since gone provoked by nothing more than a voice and a guitar.
And you don't even need to understand the voice.
That is just hooky as shit. Just strings and skins. The vocals are just something for the audience to scream as their bodys jump up and down.
Good God did I do a lot of jumping up and down for this band.
I doubt I will ever see any band live more than I saw K 106. They played every Tuesday at a club about 20 minutes away from my job. My friend Ben would travel substantially further to see them. They are so awesome live. I cannot divorce their music from their shows, their music takes me back to being in their club and that makes my brain so happy. And maybe a little sad.
Another great Japan gig experience was seeing Matsuzaki Nao
That is not the song I was looking for, but that is just an awesome video. The song that sold me on her was Ki No Uta (roughly translated: tree song). The first time I saw her perform it, she was with a band and it was all drums and bass, with her voice just as strong and loud. The second time I saw her she performed the song solo and it was beautiful in a completely different way.
I wonder if I would think less of this Japanese stuff if I had a better understanding of the language.
I can't understand half of what they sing in this song either, and it still gets me. The best version of this song that I've heard (and I went through a phase where I listened to them all).
The best/worst thing about Hawksley Workman is that he so damn prolific.
Why the hell did they get rid of the word shit? Dude is Australian. More than half of Aussie kids' first word is shit.
I'm sure there are tonnes more but my brain has been a little fuzzy for a while now (you may have noticed) so I'll just finish off with something nice and happy. And Canadian.
And I am a soft touch. So, so soft. My heart is on my sleeve. Plus it is oversized. I've got a lot of heart, is what I'm saying, and it is a very sensitive heart. Music, the right music, punches me right in my big soft heart.
Everything and everyone is putting of best of the year and best of the decade lists. I have not listened to enough music to make such a list, but there is a list I can make. Music of the last decade that punches my heart and. In a good way.
I don't mean that they make me sob. That they make me sad. That they make me feel bad. No. But they make me feel. My brain becomes aware of my eyes and my breathing and my heart rate, because they've all been affected by this music I'm listening to. Music, man, crazy.
Right. The List.
My Emotional Hits of the Naughts:
I'm going to start with the song that inspired this whole thing. I heard this on the R3-30, and then re-listened to it a good half dozen time before I could continue the countdown And this is from an album from 2008, how the hell did I miss this.?
It's a lovely little song, but the part where it's just the dude and his guitar that really gets me. That's the part that made me notice the song and then listen to it a zilion times. And the zillion times made me notice all the other bits of loveliness in there. Lots going on in that song. I want to go into detail, but I don't want to sound like a wanker.
And I could wank all over any of theses songs.
But taking inspiration from the dude and a guitar let us listen to...
How does that work? Just a dude and some kinda noise maker singing gibberish (she brings me seeds from olive trees?) and it dampens my eyes. The crowd singing along really helps, I reckon.
Speaking of singing along: one of, if not my favourite concert going experiences was seeing Arcade Fire (this was pre Neon Bible, just to give a time frame). And screaming along with the rest of the crowd to all the songs. So primal. A lot of their music gets me, but the one that works the best on me is
Just imagine yelling along with that. Good for the soul. Maybe I should have used Wake Up instead. The acoustic version, the one from the Where the Wild Things Are trailer? Hell, that trailer makes my vision blur every damn time.
But back to just a dude and a guitar.
I looked and I looked but I could not find a linkable version of Greg Macpherson's The Company Store. But I highly recommend you listen to it. It's about something that happened a long time ago to people you don't know, but it is such an angry song you just want to punch someone by the end of it. Again, anger at something long since gone provoked by nothing more than a voice and a guitar.
And you don't even need to understand the voice.
That is just hooky as shit. Just strings and skins. The vocals are just something for the audience to scream as their bodys jump up and down.
Good God did I do a lot of jumping up and down for this band.
I doubt I will ever see any band live more than I saw K 106. They played every Tuesday at a club about 20 minutes away from my job. My friend Ben would travel substantially further to see them. They are so awesome live. I cannot divorce their music from their shows, their music takes me back to being in their club and that makes my brain so happy. And maybe a little sad.
Another great Japan gig experience was seeing Matsuzaki Nao
That is not the song I was looking for, but that is just an awesome video. The song that sold me on her was Ki No Uta (roughly translated: tree song). The first time I saw her perform it, she was with a band and it was all drums and bass, with her voice just as strong and loud. The second time I saw her she performed the song solo and it was beautiful in a completely different way.
I wonder if I would think less of this Japanese stuff if I had a better understanding of the language.
I can't understand half of what they sing in this song either, and it still gets me. The best version of this song that I've heard (and I went through a phase where I listened to them all).
The best/worst thing about Hawksley Workman is that he so damn prolific.
Why the hell did they get rid of the word shit? Dude is Australian. More than half of Aussie kids' first word is shit.
I'm sure there are tonnes more but my brain has been a little fuzzy for a while now (you may have noticed) so I'll just finish off with something nice and happy. And Canadian.
Transitionless.
So it has been a few days since I bitched about how I wanted to write more, but that is okay. Cuz I've been mad busy. Didn't manage to get the whole house cleaned, but I put a pretty good dent in it. And I've been cooking! And the stuff I cooked ended up tasting good! Tomato pasta sauce from scratch! Bread! Shepherd's Pie! Yum!
And I've been, slowly but surely, converting my Japan vids. There have been all kinds of issues there. Some days just don't want to convert. It's odd.
Also odd is how do I handle this transition. How do I go from random housekeeping crap to actual writing about actual things. I have stuff I want to write about, but should I tack it on to this or just start a new entry.
New entry it is.
And I've been, slowly but surely, converting my Japan vids. There have been all kinds of issues there. Some days just don't want to convert. It's odd.
Also odd is how do I handle this transition. How do I go from random housekeeping crap to actual writing about actual things. I have stuff I want to write about, but should I tack it on to this or just start a new entry.
New entry it is.
Sunday, January 10, 2010
A Little Bit Louder and a Little Bit Worse
Stop putting shit off.
That was my New Year's resolution.
Got off to a decent start, too. Cleaned our room all to hell, moved everything, dusted, vacuumed, threw out shit that just seems to build up. Blogged. About movies. The post prior to this.
But then I started putting shit off. I have a mental and physical block. As soon as I start making any sort of change in my life, I sabotage myself. I am aware of this and this awareness does nothing except making me even more pissed off at my lack of progress.
I've been meaning to write this for a couple couple (which is to say almost a few) days, but kept putting it off. And this is nothing, this is pointless, this is just typing to keep typing. Still, I put it off.
Enough of that. I read, I play video games, I watch movies, I want to write more. So I am going to write more.
But... Here is a quick peak into my brain. It never shuts up. I replay conversations in my head; rewording things, obsessing over mistakes and things I could have phrased better. I imagine future conversations. Between me and people I know, between me and people I don't know. Between two people I don't know or two people I do. Or more than two. Just conversations constantly going on in my grey mush.
In addition to all that, I blog. In my head. I work over things, constantly editing. And when I finally have it phrased just so, someone somewhere in my head takes a break from their conversation to complement me. And then the phrase phrased just so disappears. Poof. So real word blogging is frustrating because it never matches that now forgotten bon motte of the brain. I've brain reblogged this post for a couple couple days(which is to say nearly a few) now and this is nothing like what I had imagined. And there was some good stuff in those brain blogs, let me tell you, the people in my head told me so.
I'll never be able to type fast enough to keep up with the babble in my brain.
But god fucking damnit, this it the stupid year in which I try.
But I reckon I will stop this post now. This is the post wherein I bitch, you see, the next one has an actual topic. I guess I could have mentioned that this was a bitchy post up front, but you're smart (and so ATTRACTIVE!) so I'm sure you figure it out (and man you smell nice).
That was my New Year's resolution.
Got off to a decent start, too. Cleaned our room all to hell, moved everything, dusted, vacuumed, threw out shit that just seems to build up. Blogged. About movies. The post prior to this.
But then I started putting shit off. I have a mental and physical block. As soon as I start making any sort of change in my life, I sabotage myself. I am aware of this and this awareness does nothing except making me even more pissed off at my lack of progress.
I've been meaning to write this for a couple couple (which is to say almost a few) days, but kept putting it off. And this is nothing, this is pointless, this is just typing to keep typing. Still, I put it off.
Enough of that. I read, I play video games, I watch movies, I want to write more. So I am going to write more.
But... Here is a quick peak into my brain. It never shuts up. I replay conversations in my head; rewording things, obsessing over mistakes and things I could have phrased better. I imagine future conversations. Between me and people I know, between me and people I don't know. Between two people I don't know or two people I do. Or more than two. Just conversations constantly going on in my grey mush.
In addition to all that, I blog. In my head. I work over things, constantly editing. And when I finally have it phrased just so, someone somewhere in my head takes a break from their conversation to complement me. And then the phrase phrased just so disappears. Poof. So real word blogging is frustrating because it never matches that now forgotten bon motte of the brain. I've brain reblogged this post for a couple couple days(which is to say nearly a few) now and this is nothing like what I had imagined. And there was some good stuff in those brain blogs, let me tell you, the people in my head told me so.
I'll never be able to type fast enough to keep up with the babble in my brain.
But god fucking damnit, this it the stupid year in which I try.
But I reckon I will stop this post now. This is the post wherein I bitch, you see, the next one has an actual topic. I guess I could have mentioned that this was a bitchy post up front, but you're smart (and so ATTRACTIVE!) so I'm sure you figure it out (and man you smell nice).
Saturday, January 02, 2010
Happy Happy and Merry Merry
Rang in the New Year in the preferred fashion. In a warm basement with good friend, food and drink. And crappy movies.
Well... one crappy movie, one comfort movie and one...
Crank 2 is a hard movie to describe/explain. But an easy one for me to enjoy. Just whacked out craziness all over the god damn place. Full of unlikeable people doing unlikeable things to each other for near inexplicable reasons. Maybe the easiest way to explain the movie is to spoil it. Consider that your spoiler warning.
The movie ends with our hero on fire and flipping off the audience. And it is awesome. And awful. This movie inspires awe.
BeerFest is the comfort movie that we ended off the evening with. I imagine our gracious host put it on as background sound and fury, just something to stare at as sleep took us over. An easygoing, familiar comedy. I didn't fall asleep. Because I kept noticing things that were different from the version of the movie I had watched years ago. Jokes and subplots that were missing. Nothing major, but still I noticed their absence.
I noticed the many, many differences between the Twilight book and the movie. The movie is a lot less subtle and nuanced. Which is saying something if you've ever encountered the book. Just full of odd acting and poor directorial choices and laughable action. Enjoyable in an ironic way.
Also enjoyable: drinking beer out of shot glasses. Not doing retarded amounts of beer shots. That is lame. Just drinking beer out of very small glasses. It reminded me of Japan. And the beer you were drinking never really had a chance to warm up.
Well... one crappy movie, one comfort movie and one...
Crank 2 is a hard movie to describe/explain. But an easy one for me to enjoy. Just whacked out craziness all over the god damn place. Full of unlikeable people doing unlikeable things to each other for near inexplicable reasons. Maybe the easiest way to explain the movie is to spoil it. Consider that your spoiler warning.
The movie ends with our hero on fire and flipping off the audience. And it is awesome. And awful. This movie inspires awe.
BeerFest is the comfort movie that we ended off the evening with. I imagine our gracious host put it on as background sound and fury, just something to stare at as sleep took us over. An easygoing, familiar comedy. I didn't fall asleep. Because I kept noticing things that were different from the version of the movie I had watched years ago. Jokes and subplots that were missing. Nothing major, but still I noticed their absence.
I noticed the many, many differences between the Twilight book and the movie. The movie is a lot less subtle and nuanced. Which is saying something if you've ever encountered the book. Just full of odd acting and poor directorial choices and laughable action. Enjoyable in an ironic way.
Also enjoyable: drinking beer out of shot glasses. Not doing retarded amounts of beer shots. That is lame. Just drinking beer out of very small glasses. It reminded me of Japan. And the beer you were drinking never really had a chance to warm up.
Monday, August 17, 2009
Movies, I Watched Movies, I Watched Lots and Lots of Movies
Friday was a day filled with many movies. Three movies, to be exact. All three were enjoyable, but only one was good.
District 9 is good. It is very good. I need to see it again before I call it great. Because it was not quite the film I expected. I'm not sure what I expected, but...
Whatever. This film offers up so much. It is several films in one. It's a mockumentary, an action film, a sci fi flick, a buddy pick, a horror film, and on and on and on. And it does all of this stuff well. Mayhap I or you may have wanted more of one than the film provided, but that is more our problem than the film's.
Plus there's a fair bit of black comedy and social commentary. This film does so much, it is really quite impressive. As are the effects. This whole film is handheld, with a loose, rough look and feel. And the effects are seamless. Blows GI Joe out of the water.
As does the acting. The lead is just great, he is asked to do a lot and he does it all. And does it well. Compare how he starts off the film, to how he ends up. That's a hell of an ark. Hell, that's several arks. And he is not always likable, he doesn't always do the right thing.
I want to write more, I want to talk about all kinds of little details, but I won't. Because I know there will be no end of opportunities to do so. This is a film that people will talk about. Not just for the effects or what no, but for the strange places the story goes to, the ideas underneath it all.
The idea underneath The Wicker Man, is creepy. I can see it working as a great suspense film. I hear tell the original is just such a beast. But the Nic Cage remake is not. Not at all. It is funny though.
The last half the film is just crazy silly. The problem is that you have to get through the first half of the film. Which is remarkable only in how poorly it sets the mood. It tries for dread but only ends up with odd. There all sorts of choices made here that I do not understand. Shot choices, editing choices, script choices. Then Nic cage spends the night in a flooded crypt.
When he emerges, he puts on his crazy pants. And the film goes from odd to nutty.
I enjoyed the film, but not the way intended. I want to see the original, because I'm sure it will creep me out.
Like I mentioned above, there were a lot of questionable choices made in the making of The Wicker Man. But I do not question that the people involved made said choices for no reason. There was a plan, a purpose. It was just horribly misguided. I don't think the makers ofStreet Fighter: The Legend of Chun Lihad any sort of plan. The whole thing is just inept.
Laughable. There is nothing good about this film. Which is the only thing that is good about the film. The sets look like sets. The slums look like a nice outdoor market. The teeming mass of humanity that I'm sure they were aiming for look like a small crowd of extras. The actors look like kids playing dress up.
The whole thing comes across like a bad pilot for a crappy television series.
Just did a quick search over at IMDB. District 9 had the smallest budget by far. Just goes to show that passion and talent and attention to detail sometimes actually pay off.
District 9 is good. It is very good. I need to see it again before I call it great. Because it was not quite the film I expected. I'm not sure what I expected, but...
Whatever. This film offers up so much. It is several films in one. It's a mockumentary, an action film, a sci fi flick, a buddy pick, a horror film, and on and on and on. And it does all of this stuff well. Mayhap I or you may have wanted more of one than the film provided, but that is more our problem than the film's.
Plus there's a fair bit of black comedy and social commentary. This film does so much, it is really quite impressive. As are the effects. This whole film is handheld, with a loose, rough look and feel. And the effects are seamless. Blows GI Joe out of the water.
As does the acting. The lead is just great, he is asked to do a lot and he does it all. And does it well. Compare how he starts off the film, to how he ends up. That's a hell of an ark. Hell, that's several arks. And he is not always likable, he doesn't always do the right thing.
I want to write more, I want to talk about all kinds of little details, but I won't. Because I know there will be no end of opportunities to do so. This is a film that people will talk about. Not just for the effects or what no, but for the strange places the story goes to, the ideas underneath it all.
The idea underneath The Wicker Man, is creepy. I can see it working as a great suspense film. I hear tell the original is just such a beast. But the Nic Cage remake is not. Not at all. It is funny though.
The last half the film is just crazy silly. The problem is that you have to get through the first half of the film. Which is remarkable only in how poorly it sets the mood. It tries for dread but only ends up with odd. There all sorts of choices made here that I do not understand. Shot choices, editing choices, script choices. Then Nic cage spends the night in a flooded crypt.
When he emerges, he puts on his crazy pants. And the film goes from odd to nutty.
I enjoyed the film, but not the way intended. I want to see the original, because I'm sure it will creep me out.
Like I mentioned above, there were a lot of questionable choices made in the making of The Wicker Man. But I do not question that the people involved made said choices for no reason. There was a plan, a purpose. It was just horribly misguided. I don't think the makers ofStreet Fighter: The Legend of Chun Lihad any sort of plan. The whole thing is just inept.
Laughable. There is nothing good about this film. Which is the only thing that is good about the film. The sets look like sets. The slums look like a nice outdoor market. The teeming mass of humanity that I'm sure they were aiming for look like a small crowd of extras. The actors look like kids playing dress up.
The whole thing comes across like a bad pilot for a crappy television series.
Just did a quick search over at IMDB. District 9 had the smallest budget by far. Just goes to show that passion and talent and attention to detail sometimes actually pay off.
Saturday, August 15, 2009
GI Joe is Better Than Transformers ROTF
I always want to call it Transformers ROFL. Except that film elicited no laughter from me. Which is the main reason why I prefer GI Joe. Itall a matter of tone.
Transformers is way too far up its own ass. Michael Bay has never not made a B movie. Except he doesn't know how to make a B movie. He makes silly genre films without the silliness.
This is how he approaches Transformers (please read the following in deadly serious monotone). This is the most important story about alien robots that transform into vehicles ever. Sometimes they don't even transform into vehicles, but people or ball bearings, and this is also very important. Sam's mother ate some pot brownies, this is seriously funny. These are the most important sweaty boobs running in slow motion in front of explosions in the history of forever.
And he works so hard at being so serious. Everything is sweaty and turned up to 11. And it just puts me off. It's like that scene in Total Recall when Arnold Schwarzenegger shoots that guy in the head because he sweats.
Stephen Sommers, however, may well be incapable of making anything but B movies. And I think he is totally fine with that. And so am I. He has made one truly awful film, Van Helsing, but he also made Deep Rising which just tickles me every time I see it.
Stephen knows what he is working with and works with it. Crazy concept, I know.
GI Joe eh? We'll need cool vehicles and guns and lasers that go pew pew and big battles and chases and swords. And hot chicks. And maybe I can have a scene where one of the hot chicks runs on a treadmill. Yeah, that would be cool. And Snake Eyes and Storm shadow have to fight lots, we can even have flashbacks to them fighting when they were kids, yeah that would be cool. And we'll give some of the Joes super suits so they can do even cooler stuff than usual.
It's just a light and fluffy concoction. And you don't really mind when some of the parts don't add up because it's just a light and fluffy concoction.
The chicks are hot, things blow up and it never ever stops moving forward. That Wayans brother isn't even all that annoying in this. That takes some skill.
The one area where Transformers trumps Joe is in the visuals. Transformers looks much better. A lot of the effects work in Joe looks rushed and somewhat sloppy. Bay's films have always looked shiny and artificial, so the giant robots fit right in.
Transformers is way too far up its own ass. Michael Bay has never not made a B movie. Except he doesn't know how to make a B movie. He makes silly genre films without the silliness.
This is how he approaches Transformers (please read the following in deadly serious monotone). This is the most important story about alien robots that transform into vehicles ever. Sometimes they don't even transform into vehicles, but people or ball bearings, and this is also very important. Sam's mother ate some pot brownies, this is seriously funny. These are the most important sweaty boobs running in slow motion in front of explosions in the history of forever.
And he works so hard at being so serious. Everything is sweaty and turned up to 11. And it just puts me off. It's like that scene in Total Recall when Arnold Schwarzenegger shoots that guy in the head because he sweats.
Stephen Sommers, however, may well be incapable of making anything but B movies. And I think he is totally fine with that. And so am I. He has made one truly awful film, Van Helsing, but he also made Deep Rising which just tickles me every time I see it.
Stephen knows what he is working with and works with it. Crazy concept, I know.
GI Joe eh? We'll need cool vehicles and guns and lasers that go pew pew and big battles and chases and swords. And hot chicks. And maybe I can have a scene where one of the hot chicks runs on a treadmill. Yeah, that would be cool. And Snake Eyes and Storm shadow have to fight lots, we can even have flashbacks to them fighting when they were kids, yeah that would be cool. And we'll give some of the Joes super suits so they can do even cooler stuff than usual.
It's just a light and fluffy concoction. And you don't really mind when some of the parts don't add up because it's just a light and fluffy concoction.
The chicks are hot, things blow up and it never ever stops moving forward. That Wayans brother isn't even all that annoying in this. That takes some skill.
The one area where Transformers trumps Joe is in the visuals. Transformers looks much better. A lot of the effects work in Joe looks rushed and somewhat sloppy. Bay's films have always looked shiny and artificial, so the giant robots fit right in.
Sunday, August 09, 2009
Two Movies in One Day
On Tuesday this past week I saw two movies. Because Tuesday is cheap movie day. I saw Transformers 2 in the morning and Funny People at night.
Obviously, these are two very different movies. The biggest difference being that one is actually good.
The fight scenes in this new Transformers are so much better than the first film. It is still not all that easy to tell who is who, but what they are doing to each other is easy to follow and just plain cool looking. These robots know kung fu.
But I don't know how much Michael Bay had to do with these scenes. It doesn't seem like his style. Not enough cuts, the camera is pulled back.
I have a theory about Michael Bay: he is not a very confident director. That explains the quick cuts. Hey look, this is cool, and so is this, and this is too, HEY LOOK OVER HERE AT THIS COOL THING, it goes BOOOOOOOOM. He is not sure what the audience might like, so he shows us everything all the time. No pace, no mood, just BOOM.
Everything boom, everything shiny or sweaty, everything either too fast or slowed down. And when there is something dramatic going on, put that camera low and circle it around whatever it is that is supposed to be dramatic.
And don't get me started on his comedy. Michael Bay has no clue when it comes to comedy, which is sad because he crammed this flick full of his shitty humour. It drips flop sweat. Going back to the confidence theory, he has no faith in the jokes so he has the actors say the lines louder and faster.
And he just shift in and out of comedy. He shifts in and out of everything. Character come and go as the script dictates. Notice that I did not say plot. People show up for no reason, people do stuff counter-intuitive to the plot, or their character or both.
Here is where I spoil the end of the film. There is a big scene between Sam and his parents where he tells his dad that he has to let go. He has to run away and let Sam do what he has to do. Which would be a call back to a scene earlier in the movie, except the earlier scene was played for laugh and it was about the mother having trouble letting go. So the parents flee. They run away. They let Sam go. Sam says the same thing to his hot girlfriend but she sez "nuh-uh" and he sez "okay" and then they run together in slow motion.
Then Sam dies. And his parents are right fucking there for some reason.
Then Sam comes back to life and then some Transformer sacrifices his life to give Optimus Prime a power-up. Optimus Prime kills the bad guys and then just shrugs off the power-up/fallen comrade without a second thought.
To recap: fight scenes good, everything else is absolute shit. And I don't even want to get started on the ghetto-bots.
Funny People is the good film, in case you were wondering. In this film funny people do funny things. And these same funny people are sometimes mean people or selfish people and they do selfish things or mean things.
Which is a nice change from most films. Like Apatow's previous films, this is a messy film. There are plot threads that fall by the wayside, others that go around and around in circles.
It's nice, but also sometimes frustrating. A "Why did they do this, instead of that?" kind of thing. For me, personally, I wanted more behind the scenes stuff. The craft of comedy. It's in there, but I wanted more. Could have done with less of the third act romance. Or have it better integrated into the rest of the film. Having it be it's own distinct chunk, and that chunk being the end of the film was not the best move.
But the funny stuff? Funny. The polar opposite of Transformers. Funny stuff is said off offhandedly, just floated out there into the conversation. Loved that.
Still, there was a good half hour of fat that could be trimmed from the running time. It could be worse, though, Transformers 2 could lose about 2 hours, easy.
Just one more thing. People who defend Transformers 2 with the old "What did you expect, it's based on a bunch of toys?" are stupid. Indiana Jones was based on Saturday morning serials. It doesn't matter that the Transformers films are basically commercials for the toys. All films are commercials: for themselves, for their DVDs, for the awards season. Just put some care into your work, some thought, some fucking craft. Don't hide behind bullshit excuses.
Obviously, these are two very different movies. The biggest difference being that one is actually good.
The fight scenes in this new Transformers are so much better than the first film. It is still not all that easy to tell who is who, but what they are doing to each other is easy to follow and just plain cool looking. These robots know kung fu.
But I don't know how much Michael Bay had to do with these scenes. It doesn't seem like his style. Not enough cuts, the camera is pulled back.
I have a theory about Michael Bay: he is not a very confident director. That explains the quick cuts. Hey look, this is cool, and so is this, and this is too, HEY LOOK OVER HERE AT THIS COOL THING, it goes BOOOOOOOOM. He is not sure what the audience might like, so he shows us everything all the time. No pace, no mood, just BOOM.
Everything boom, everything shiny or sweaty, everything either too fast or slowed down. And when there is something dramatic going on, put that camera low and circle it around whatever it is that is supposed to be dramatic.
And don't get me started on his comedy. Michael Bay has no clue when it comes to comedy, which is sad because he crammed this flick full of his shitty humour. It drips flop sweat. Going back to the confidence theory, he has no faith in the jokes so he has the actors say the lines louder and faster.
And he just shift in and out of comedy. He shifts in and out of everything. Character come and go as the script dictates. Notice that I did not say plot. People show up for no reason, people do stuff counter-intuitive to the plot, or their character or both.
Here is where I spoil the end of the film. There is a big scene between Sam and his parents where he tells his dad that he has to let go. He has to run away and let Sam do what he has to do. Which would be a call back to a scene earlier in the movie, except the earlier scene was played for laugh and it was about the mother having trouble letting go. So the parents flee. They run away. They let Sam go. Sam says the same thing to his hot girlfriend but she sez "nuh-uh" and he sez "okay" and then they run together in slow motion.
Then Sam dies. And his parents are right fucking there for some reason.
Then Sam comes back to life and then some Transformer sacrifices his life to give Optimus Prime a power-up. Optimus Prime kills the bad guys and then just shrugs off the power-up/fallen comrade without a second thought.
To recap: fight scenes good, everything else is absolute shit. And I don't even want to get started on the ghetto-bots.
Funny People is the good film, in case you were wondering. In this film funny people do funny things. And these same funny people are sometimes mean people or selfish people and they do selfish things or mean things.
Which is a nice change from most films. Like Apatow's previous films, this is a messy film. There are plot threads that fall by the wayside, others that go around and around in circles.
It's nice, but also sometimes frustrating. A "Why did they do this, instead of that?" kind of thing. For me, personally, I wanted more behind the scenes stuff. The craft of comedy. It's in there, but I wanted more. Could have done with less of the third act romance. Or have it better integrated into the rest of the film. Having it be it's own distinct chunk, and that chunk being the end of the film was not the best move.
But the funny stuff? Funny. The polar opposite of Transformers. Funny stuff is said off offhandedly, just floated out there into the conversation. Loved that.
Still, there was a good half hour of fat that could be trimmed from the running time. It could be worse, though, Transformers 2 could lose about 2 hours, easy.
Just one more thing. People who defend Transformers 2 with the old "What did you expect, it's based on a bunch of toys?" are stupid. Indiana Jones was based on Saturday morning serials. It doesn't matter that the Transformers films are basically commercials for the toys. All films are commercials: for themselves, for their DVDs, for the awards season. Just put some care into your work, some thought, some fucking craft. Don't hide behind bullshit excuses.
Monday, July 27, 2009
Let Us Talk About Movies
By that I mean I will blog about movies I have recently seen and then imagine your responses and then ignore them.
First movie: Lesbian Vampire Killers.
The first half of this movie is a couple tics better than good, the second half a couple tics less.
The prologue is nicely done, sets up the lore in a quick and humorous manner. The introduction of the two leads is also nicely done. The tone of the film is set within these first few minutes. It is an odd mix: cartoonish yet full of British stoicism. Stoicism isn't quite the right word but I am lazy.
The film does a good job of setting the scene, and putting all pieces in place.
Then it doesn't quite know what to do with them.
The same few jokes are repeated. A bit too much clunky exposition falls out of mouths not talented enough to make it sound good.
And there are not enough bare tits. And an odd lack of blood.
But there are a couple good gore gags.
It all leads up to an ending. Notice the lack of adjective. That was intentional.
Here is where I sum up the film in a quick and pithy manner: If you loved Shaun of the Dead, you'll like Lesbian Vampire Killers.
I can not sum up You Don't Mess With the Zohan in a quick and pithy manner. Save to say that it does for comedies what The Spirit did for comic book movies. Within the first few minutes of the flick, Adam Sandler's Zohan willfully catches both a hacky sack and a cooked fish betwixt his butt cheeks.
That trailer gives you a taste of what to expect. But it doesn't prepare you for how over the top it gets. You laugh because you can't believe that they put such stupid stuff in a major motion picture, not because said stupid stuff is funny. I don't want to give examples because I don't want to ruin it for anyone, but that doesn't matter because I cannot in good faith recommend this movie to anyone I know and like.
Two of my friends saw this in the theatre and spent most of the movie's running time with their heads in their hands. I can understand why. But I am and always have been fascinated by gloriously wrong-headed, single-minded disasterpieces.
The last film to discuss is the latest Harry Potter film.
This is a gorgeous film. Just lovely to take in. And the visual storytelling is markedly improved from the previous Potter installment. It looks great, it sounds great, it flows great, everyone gives great performances, there are great character-based beats.
Then it all ends poorly. The ending is just not done well. Some fairly major things happen and they are not given the attention they deserve.
This is not a short film but it never felt it. But the last ten/fifteen minutes feel super rushed and it lets the rest of the film down.
First movie: Lesbian Vampire Killers.
The first half of this movie is a couple tics better than good, the second half a couple tics less.
The prologue is nicely done, sets up the lore in a quick and humorous manner. The introduction of the two leads is also nicely done. The tone of the film is set within these first few minutes. It is an odd mix: cartoonish yet full of British stoicism. Stoicism isn't quite the right word but I am lazy.
The film does a good job of setting the scene, and putting all pieces in place.
Then it doesn't quite know what to do with them.
The same few jokes are repeated. A bit too much clunky exposition falls out of mouths not talented enough to make it sound good.
And there are not enough bare tits. And an odd lack of blood.
But there are a couple good gore gags.
It all leads up to an ending. Notice the lack of adjective. That was intentional.
Here is where I sum up the film in a quick and pithy manner: If you loved Shaun of the Dead, you'll like Lesbian Vampire Killers.
I can not sum up You Don't Mess With the Zohan in a quick and pithy manner. Save to say that it does for comedies what The Spirit did for comic book movies. Within the first few minutes of the flick, Adam Sandler's Zohan willfully catches both a hacky sack and a cooked fish betwixt his butt cheeks.
That trailer gives you a taste of what to expect. But it doesn't prepare you for how over the top it gets. You laugh because you can't believe that they put such stupid stuff in a major motion picture, not because said stupid stuff is funny. I don't want to give examples because I don't want to ruin it for anyone, but that doesn't matter because I cannot in good faith recommend this movie to anyone I know and like.
Two of my friends saw this in the theatre and spent most of the movie's running time with their heads in their hands. I can understand why. But I am and always have been fascinated by gloriously wrong-headed, single-minded disasterpieces.
The last film to discuss is the latest Harry Potter film.
This is a gorgeous film. Just lovely to take in. And the visual storytelling is markedly improved from the previous Potter installment. It looks great, it sounds great, it flows great, everyone gives great performances, there are great character-based beats.
Then it all ends poorly. The ending is just not done well. Some fairly major things happen and they are not given the attention they deserve.
This is not a short film but it never felt it. But the last ten/fifteen minutes feel super rushed and it lets the rest of the film down.
Monday, June 08, 2009
Up
Pixar cannot make a bad film. Cars is their worst film. By far. And it is still a good flick. And they know it. So they keep pushing themselves.
Can we make a kitchen full of vermin adorable? Yes we can.
Can we make a trash compactor adorable? Yes we can.
Can we make an old curmudgeon adorable? Yes we can.
Can we make the audience cry within the first fifteen minutes? Yes we can.
This film doesn't just tug your heart strings, it plays a lovely tune.
It is gorgeous. It is funny. It is sad. It is exciting. it is light. It is dark.
It is a Pixar film.
And that is all you ever need know.
Can we make a kitchen full of vermin adorable? Yes we can.
Can we make a trash compactor adorable? Yes we can.
Can we make an old curmudgeon adorable? Yes we can.
Can we make the audience cry within the first fifteen minutes? Yes we can.
This film doesn't just tug your heart strings, it plays a lovely tune.
It is gorgeous. It is funny. It is sad. It is exciting. it is light. It is dark.
It is a Pixar film.
And that is all you ever need know.
Monday, June 01, 2009
Drag Me To Hell
Spiderman 3 showed what happens when a film gets away from Sam Raimi. He throws his bag of tricks at it and sees what sticks.
Drag Me To Hell shows what happens when a Sam Raimi gets his way. He throws his bag of tricks at it. And it all sticks.
This is a glorious film. It opens with a cute kid being flung to his death and then dragged to hell. This is a very lean film. And very mean. If a you see a gun in the first act, you can be damn sure it will be used.
There are no guns in this film.
There is no blood in this film.
Sam Raimi is well aware that there are many other fluids that can come out of a human body, or that can splatter all over a human body.
And Sam Raimi is well aware of the importance of sound. Some of the most disgusting stuff is nothing but sound effects. Yes: disgusting. I don't care what this film is rated there is stuff in here that could upset a stomach or two. Sam knows what to show, what not to show, and when to show or not show it.
This is film is exactly what its title promises. And then some. I jumped, I laughed, I often times did both at the same time.
Drag Me To Hell shows what happens when a Sam Raimi gets his way. He throws his bag of tricks at it. And it all sticks.
This is a glorious film. It opens with a cute kid being flung to his death and then dragged to hell. This is a very lean film. And very mean. If a you see a gun in the first act, you can be damn sure it will be used.
There are no guns in this film.
There is no blood in this film.
Sam Raimi is well aware that there are many other fluids that can come out of a human body, or that can splatter all over a human body.
And Sam Raimi is well aware of the importance of sound. Some of the most disgusting stuff is nothing but sound effects. Yes: disgusting. I don't care what this film is rated there is stuff in here that could upset a stomach or two. Sam knows what to show, what not to show, and when to show or not show it.
This is film is exactly what its title promises. And then some. I jumped, I laughed, I often times did both at the same time.
Crank and Rambo
Wow. These movies are crazy.
Crank starts off crazy and just keeps on being crazy. Nothing gets in the way of its craziness. Not the budget, nothing. This is a cheap looking film. But a good looking film. You can tell just how fake some of the shots are, but the shots are cool so you understand why they wanted them in. Cheesy effects or no.
It has a crazy internal logic. A comic book/ video game logic. It just appeals to me.
Rambo does not start off crazy. It starts off with footage of real life atrocities. It turned my stomach. I don't like real life violence. Well... real life bullet and war related violence. Real life Mixed Martial Arts based violence is fine by me.
And gratuitous movie violence? Love the hell out of it. Which means I was squealing with glee for the last half an hour of Rambo. I had read about the violence in this movie. It did not prepare me. Nothing prepares you for a hat floating above red goo. Or a truck full o' folks just kinda disappearing in a cloud of bullets and gore.
Yeah.
Good times.
Crank starts off crazy and just keeps on being crazy. Nothing gets in the way of its craziness. Not the budget, nothing. This is a cheap looking film. But a good looking film. You can tell just how fake some of the shots are, but the shots are cool so you understand why they wanted them in. Cheesy effects or no.
It has a crazy internal logic. A comic book/ video game logic. It just appeals to me.
Rambo does not start off crazy. It starts off with footage of real life atrocities. It turned my stomach. I don't like real life violence. Well... real life bullet and war related violence. Real life Mixed Martial Arts based violence is fine by me.
And gratuitous movie violence? Love the hell out of it. Which means I was squealing with glee for the last half an hour of Rambo. I had read about the violence in this movie. It did not prepare me. Nothing prepares you for a hat floating above red goo. Or a truck full o' folks just kinda disappearing in a cloud of bullets and gore.
Yeah.
Good times.
Sunday, May 24, 2009
Terminator Salvation
I didn't realize that there was no colon in the title. I thought it was Terminator: Salvation. The lack of a colon makes it make less sense.
Which is telling. Not that the movie makes no sense, but that it is thoughtless and pointless.
The first fifteen minutes are a great indication of what is about to follow.
It starts with a horribly written, poorly acted scene. We are introduced to a new character in the Terminator mythos, Marcus Wright. He, more so than John Connor, is the lead of this movie. And he has never been mentioned in any of the previous three films. Hmmmmm...
After that crap, we see a bunch of text on the screen, explaining the Terminator story. Judgment Day and all that. Just a big ole wall o' text. That is lazy writing and direction.
After that we are treated to a great action scene. There is a great tracking shot, following John Connor into a helicopter, flying the helicopter and crashing the helicopter. Best part of the movie, in my opinion. And it is right near the start. All kinds of ominous portents in this review.
Cut to John Connor on a plane. He jumps out of a plane. Cut to John Connor on a sub as Michael Ironside explains his character to us.
Yup.
That is how the movie goes. Jumps from place to place, plot point to plot point, with no care given at all. All the film's attention is on the action scenes. And the action scenes are all well done. The whole film looks and sounds great.
But with no one to care about, what the hell is the point?
There is no point to this film. This story does not advance the 'Terminator' story at all. This film adds nothing to the cannon.
At least T3 ended with a bang. it killed off the world. Which is not how you expect a Summer Blockbuster to end. Sure, it kind of made the first two Terminator movies basically pointless, and it was not a good movie overall, but there is something in that film I can point to and appreciate. Other than the special effects, which are expected at this point.
What I'm saying is this is the worst Terminator film yet. There is no real reason to see it other than the action sequences. There are no characters to care about. Other than the kid who plays Kyle Reese, there are no remarkable performances. The music is forgettable. There is a scene where the whole god damn movie is explained to us. Stopping the movie dead in its tracks. So many nits to pick.
Move along folks. Nothing to see here.
Which is telling. Not that the movie makes no sense, but that it is thoughtless and pointless.
The first fifteen minutes are a great indication of what is about to follow.
It starts with a horribly written, poorly acted scene. We are introduced to a new character in the Terminator mythos, Marcus Wright. He, more so than John Connor, is the lead of this movie. And he has never been mentioned in any of the previous three films. Hmmmmm...
After that crap, we see a bunch of text on the screen, explaining the Terminator story. Judgment Day and all that. Just a big ole wall o' text. That is lazy writing and direction.
After that we are treated to a great action scene. There is a great tracking shot, following John Connor into a helicopter, flying the helicopter and crashing the helicopter. Best part of the movie, in my opinion. And it is right near the start. All kinds of ominous portents in this review.
Cut to John Connor on a plane. He jumps out of a plane. Cut to John Connor on a sub as Michael Ironside explains his character to us.
Yup.
That is how the movie goes. Jumps from place to place, plot point to plot point, with no care given at all. All the film's attention is on the action scenes. And the action scenes are all well done. The whole film looks and sounds great.
But with no one to care about, what the hell is the point?
There is no point to this film. This story does not advance the 'Terminator' story at all. This film adds nothing to the cannon.
At least T3 ended with a bang. it killed off the world. Which is not how you expect a Summer Blockbuster to end. Sure, it kind of made the first two Terminator movies basically pointless, and it was not a good movie overall, but there is something in that film I can point to and appreciate. Other than the special effects, which are expected at this point.
What I'm saying is this is the worst Terminator film yet. There is no real reason to see it other than the action sequences. There are no characters to care about. Other than the kid who plays Kyle Reese, there are no remarkable performances. The music is forgettable. There is a scene where the whole god damn movie is explained to us. Stopping the movie dead in its tracks. So many nits to pick.
Move along folks. Nothing to see here.
Sunday, May 17, 2009
Star Trek
I will be watching The Spirit again to try and dissect where and how badly it went wrong. I will also be re watching Star Trek. Because it is a really well put together film.
It starts with a bang. It is a great opening. Right off the bat, it demonstrates just how different this Trek is from past versions. Space is not sterile blackness. Light explodes across the screen whenever possible. The battles are not the slow, submarines in space affairs of before. The lasers are not solid beams. There is a lot more motion.
And George Kirk dies. That changes the character of James T a fair bit. It changes his motivations, but not his core. But the death of George Kirk also shows how this Trek is a lot closer to the classic Trek than some of the later series. Shatner was cast as Kirk for a reason. As was all the original cast. And there is a reason they are all so easy to imitate/mock.
They are larger than life, they are operatic. They had to be. Most of the original series was shot from a distance. So the cast set their standards to that. They were playing to the cheap seats. When the camera got in close, though, they didn't pull back.
The camera in this movie is almost always close, in on the faces. In on the action. The framing of the action and the actors is operatic, so the actors can be a little less so.
But they are all fantastic. Each actor inhabits their characters, without falling into straight mimicry.
There are some nits that can be picked.
The first for me is the introduction of kid Kirk. I understand that they were trying to show how the lack of his birth father had made him rebellious and angry. But the scene to me just made me think he was a douche. An ungrateful little shit. The bar scene a few scenes later was all does a much better job of setting up his character.
I understand that they wanted the symmetry there: young Kirk - young Spock - adult Spock - adult Kirk. But the kid Kirk is easily the weakest scene in the whole damn film, so I woulda chucked it. But that's me.
I also didn't like the chase scene on the ice planet. It seemed to Phantom Menace-y. Remember that scene with the fish? Yeah. Lame then, still lame now. Like a piece of screenwriting software flagged that section of the film for not having enough action. Superfluous.
And the villain of the piece didn't have all that much to do. I mean he did a lot. A lot. He changed the whole god damn Universe. But he seemed less a foil for the crew of the Enterprise and more like a plot point.
But this film was not about the villain, it was about the crew of the Enterprise. Who they are, how they fit together. And on that point, Star Trek more than succeeded.
It starts with a bang. It is a great opening. Right off the bat, it demonstrates just how different this Trek is from past versions. Space is not sterile blackness. Light explodes across the screen whenever possible. The battles are not the slow, submarines in space affairs of before. The lasers are not solid beams. There is a lot more motion.
And George Kirk dies. That changes the character of James T a fair bit. It changes his motivations, but not his core. But the death of George Kirk also shows how this Trek is a lot closer to the classic Trek than some of the later series. Shatner was cast as Kirk for a reason. As was all the original cast. And there is a reason they are all so easy to imitate/mock.
They are larger than life, they are operatic. They had to be. Most of the original series was shot from a distance. So the cast set their standards to that. They were playing to the cheap seats. When the camera got in close, though, they didn't pull back.
The camera in this movie is almost always close, in on the faces. In on the action. The framing of the action and the actors is operatic, so the actors can be a little less so.
But they are all fantastic. Each actor inhabits their characters, without falling into straight mimicry.
There are some nits that can be picked.
The first for me is the introduction of kid Kirk. I understand that they were trying to show how the lack of his birth father had made him rebellious and angry. But the scene to me just made me think he was a douche. An ungrateful little shit. The bar scene a few scenes later was all does a much better job of setting up his character.
I understand that they wanted the symmetry there: young Kirk - young Spock - adult Spock - adult Kirk. But the kid Kirk is easily the weakest scene in the whole damn film, so I woulda chucked it. But that's me.
I also didn't like the chase scene on the ice planet. It seemed to Phantom Menace-y. Remember that scene with the fish? Yeah. Lame then, still lame now. Like a piece of screenwriting software flagged that section of the film for not having enough action. Superfluous.
And the villain of the piece didn't have all that much to do. I mean he did a lot. A lot. He changed the whole god damn Universe. But he seemed less a foil for the crew of the Enterprise and more like a plot point.
But this film was not about the villain, it was about the crew of the Enterprise. Who they are, how they fit together. And on that point, Star Trek more than succeeded.
More Spirit
I don't know how to approach this. I almost want to re-watch the movie to help me remember how bad the movie was.
But I won't. Not yet. But I will.
I have always maintained that you can learn a lot more from failure than success.
But I won't. Not yet. But I will.
I have always maintained that you can learn a lot more from failure than success.
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