My Saturday

I could just change the date of this blog. Change it back to Saturday, make it look like I wrote it earlier. I've done it in the past. Or maybe I've done it in the present but changed back the date so that you only THINK that I've done it in the past. But not no more. I didn't blog all weekend or Monday. Nor did I go to the gym. I suck. But starting now I'm trying to decrease my sucking. No more misleading all my millions of readers.

Right. My Saturday. Right.

It was good. It was a good day. It had lots of Carla in it, that always helps. It started with a bunch of Ninja Gaiden (WTF? The spell checker doesn't recognize ninja. That's just wrong. Gaiden I could see not being in there, but ninja?) playing, that always helps as well. The I showered and Carla and I did some very brief shoe shopping, which is the best kind of shoe shopping. We also stopped in at Chapters. Carla offered to buy me a magazine and I deferred. What the hell is wrong with me? A couple years back I was probably spending more money on periodicals than food. Not anymore. Ever since Carla made me start keeping track of my money, I've been a lot more careful with it. Odd how that works.

After my non magazine getting, and Carla's massive magazine and manga getting (oh how the tables have turned!), we went and saw Broken Lizard's Club Dread. I like comedy and I like horror and there is a distinct dearth of film making comedy troupes these days, how could I NOT go? I liked this movie. More than Super Troopers. I found Troopers to be intermittently funny. I also found Club Dread to be intermittently funny, but the dry patches were not as dry nor as long. Plus this movie had boobies. Gotta like that. I like that the members of Broken Lizard probably wrote this movie for the express purpose of getting paid to spend a couple months in a tropical paradise surrounded by topless chicks. More power to 'em. I'd do that too, if I could.

The film's title comes up over a close up of a recently decapitated body spasming, shot from the point of view of the head and the movie ends with... nah I won't ruin the last shot but it nicely bookends the film. I really liked that title shot though, it set the tone for all that followed. I also liked that the guy who played the biggest prick in the last Broken Lizard film got to play the hero in this one. I liked a lot about this movie.

I liked almost nothing about Dreamcatcher which a group of us rented Saturday night. I can think of only two redeeming qualities. The first is that it only cost a buck to rent. The second is that the film looked pretty nice. The woods where most of the film takes place are well shot, especially some of the panoramic shots. Every thing else? Shit. And not just any kind of shit. Bloody shit. Accompanied by unpleasant farting noises. Seriously, who the hell thought that this film was a good idea? There were a fair few recognizable names involved in this travesty, what attracted them to this film? The book wasn't any good, and I'm normally a fan of Stephen King's work. It was overlong, poorly paced and seemed like King was stealing from his own previous works. It was like a poorer version of The Tommyknockers. With shit weasels. The film version was even worse. The child actors were horrible, there was no real flow to the tale being told. The tale itself was rediculous. The effects were not all that great. The sound effects were sometimes laughable. As was the sudden appearance of a british accent. Most annoying was the fact that I think they changed the ending from the book, but I can't remember for certain and I don't plan on re-reading the damn thing to make sure. But it was fun to watch at least. There was a group of us, and we were drinking, which always helps.

I usually think that Roeper, of Ebert & fame is a waste of skin and air and idiocy (I mean there are other, much more amusing idiots who could put Roeper's idiocy to better use) but I grudgingly admit that when he voted Dreamcatcher the worst film of last year he wasn't horribly, horribly wrong.